What the Movie Road House Taught Me About Politics in Product Management
There are many skills required to build and ship great products. You need to ask the right questions, be a great listener, deeply analyze and understand your competitors, communicate specs flawlessly, manage and prioritize your backlog, review and revise constantly, and so much more. But one skill that is really hard to master is the art of political influence. It’s really fucking hard. Every person you come into contact with has a different personality type with varying baggage and different areas of interest. You can build the coolest products all day long, but it will fall on its face if you cannot evangelize it internally.
People are petty, people are self-interested, people are self-conscious, but people are also caring, flexible, and open to taking risks. Some people can be a mixture while others change personalities under certain situations. It is a difficult task to define, understand, and balance everyone’s personalities and needs (especially in tandem with understanding your customer). Your method of getting buy-in from people needs to be constantly adjusted because people’s needs and desires are constantly evolving. What is a Product Manager to do??
Life Imitates…80s Action Movies
When I think of wholesome characters who excel at people management, I think of Patrick Swayze’s character Dalton in the best 80s movie of all time: Road House.
Life lessons and sweaty Tai Chi scenes…Road House has it all!
For those unfamiliar with the film, Patrick Swayze plays a nationally-acclaimed and extremely successful bouncer named Dalton. Action movies are not exactly known for their complex plots, but Road House’s storyline of a renown bouncer saving a town from greed and evil just…rocks my ass off.
Sure, Dalton has some sexy Tai Chi moments, works out shirtless constantly, and is great with knife fights. However, his ability to kick ass and rip out people’s throats are used only as last-resort options. Instead, he follows Three Simple Rules for managing tough situations with people without even lifting a finger. As Product Managers, we can use Dalton’s Three Simple Rules to help us manage the unknown, win people over, and resolve tough situations without things turning into a bloodbath. Now that’s what I call political influence!
One, never underestimate your opponent. Expect the unexpected.
Just two men amped up with rage and testosterone. What could possibly go wrong??
While there are cultural norms and established societal rules that keep us mostly on track and allow us to function in a civilized manner, there is plenty of emotional baggage, unspoken interests, and suppressed grievances that reside in every person you know. Under certain circumstances, two people with the same amount of information can react in totally unexpected and differing ways based on their perceptions and understanding of the world.
For Dalton, that could look like an opponent bringing a knife to a simple fist fight. For Product Managers, that could look like an executive changing a release deadline without notifying you. These examples are completely unexpected and not in line with established mores. Sometimes people just go rogue…how can you even avoid this?
Constant communication and observance of the people around you is a great way to hone your political skill. The more you talk with people, the more you understand their communication styles. More importantly, you are able to notice subtle changes in their tone and body language depending on the situation. A persisting change in someone’s mannerisms may be an indicator that they may not act in ways you once expected.
When you notice these subtle changes, you can try to eliminate any unknowns here by amping up your communication with this person and making sure things are going smoothly. I cannot tell you how many times this would have saved my ass and prevented a lot of unexpected problems.
However, it’s not always appropriate to go into full investigation mode just because someone happened to twitch their eye as you were communicating release dates. Knowing the difference becomes easier as you observe the people around you and understand their more nuanced quirks.
Learn people’s communication styles, their weak/strong points, areas of interest, things that piss them off, things that light them up, and any other quirk. By paying attention to the facets that make up a person’s personality, you can better expect the unexpected and protect your bottom line: building and shipping products that both internal and external stakeholders support.
Two, take it outside. Never start anything inside the bar unless it’s absolutely necessary.
Stale beer and spilled blood…must be a Monday all-hands meeting!
Have you ever witnessed a bar fight? It’s in an enclosed space so things are easily broken, it’s horribly embarrassing for the person getting their ass kicked, and anyone who wants to let off some steam can simply join in on the ruckus and start throwing hands.
As the head bouncer of the Double Deuce, it was in Dalton’s best interest to take as many escalating fights possible outside. Fighting + A bunch of drunk people in an enclosed space = full-on brawl.
While product management itself is not akin to a bar fight, there are certain social situations you run into as a product manager where things can get heated. There is a time and place for public confrontation on big issues, but problems like botched communication, unmatched expectations, or unexpected issues with a release can be common when attempting to influence your way to a product being built.
As these issues arise, fighting with or being overly critical of a colleague in a public meeting with others could result in a dog-pile at worst but would be a completely embarrassing and shameful experience at best. The ability to take things offline when necessary will not only give your colleague the grace and safe environment they need to talk through a mistake or accept criticism, it will increase the trust and respect they have for you (which is a big contributor to your level of political influence).
Be nice. (Until it’s time to not be nice)
Just when you thought it couldn’t get any better, Sam Elliott shows up?! God, I love this movie.
Well, well, well, if it isn’t the most iconic line of the film (and probably the most important rule). You see, at the end of the day, you can get very far in life by just being nice. People may disagree with me but personally, I have received tons of perks from being nice (discounts, friendships, stunningly clear skin and a glowing aura…).
In Road House, Dalton uses kindness as a tool to neutralize conflict and attract hot babes with doctorate degrees. For product people, we can use kindness to increase our likability and popularity among colleagues. Simple isn’t it? Well, not everyone wants to put in the effort of being nice.
Not everyone will work a weekend so a coworker doesn’t miss a deadline. Not everyone will take a public bullet for a mistake they didn’t make in order to spare embarrassment for someone on their team. Not everyone will water their colleague’s dying plant while they are on vacation (why is this one making me emotional?).
You can learn the art of being nice without being a pushover. There are plenty of things you can do when interacting with your colleagues and stakeholders, big and small, that impact your relationship in a positive way. Nurturing these relationships in a positive way helps you strengthen bonds, get to know people better, garner respect, and increase trustworthiness. Because of the nature of product management where you are responsible for the product but have zero authority, being nice and collaborative to the people around you makes it so much easier to influence opinions or get buy-in on product decisions.
Okay, wait…hold on…
What was that last part there? — “Until it’s time to not be nice”?
Well, it was all fun and games for a while. We were nice, we gained trust, and made some friendships along the way. But now, it’s time to rip out some throats.
I’m not kidding. Patrick Swayze literally rips out people’s throats in this movie.
So you have followed Dalton’s Three Simple Rules and gained a lot of political influence and trust among your colleagues. You are able to neutralize conflict, anticipate the unexpected, and keep your coworker’s plant alive!
But unfortunately, business is not all sunshine and roses and sometimes you have to die on a hill for something you believe in, even if that belief is unpopular. When that time comes, having a good track record from all the product and political work you put in will help you get through this moment.
A trustworthy, credible, and well-liked product person will have an easier time being heard and respected for dying on a hill over something they find important than a product person with no political influence and no nurtured relationships with stakeholders.
So, be nice. Until it is time to not be nice. But remember, if you die on a hill over and over again, you lose credibility and political influence. Be careful and use that tactic sparingly and in a strategic manner.
Conclusion
Often in Product Management, it doesn’t matter what products you build if you don’t have stakeholder buy-in. Your influence, trustworthiness, credibility, and respectability will take you far in your ability to get buy-in from stakeholders. If Dalton could use his Three Simple Rules to influence people without brute force, Product Managers can use them in the same way to hone their political skills, get buy-in, and build amazing products with less friction.
